Chapter 953 Mess, guilt, remorse, loathe (1)
Shui truly wanted to give him the benefit of the doubt. She trusted in Jun's belief that Lin only focused on living a changed life with his brother and fulfilling the small dream he had.
But the sleeping resentment erupted within her once more as her heart broke today.
Once again.
The only people she could blame were Hou Lin and Zhan Yahui, who wreaked havoc in their lives. Zhan Yahui was no more, but Lin was. Right there in front of her.
She stood closer, her balled fists shaking and trembling. "Do you think…that it's over? Zhan Yahui died and you faced your punishment. Now you are back in society so do you think that everything has gone back to normal?"
Lin stared at her in silence.
She wryle laughed. "Nothing has changed, Hou Lin. For a certain man, nothing has changed for him. He is still at the same place he was years ago. He would always be in that position because of what you and Zhan Yahui put him through!"
He parted his lips but he didn't know what to respond. He didn't know who she was talking about or why that person was still suffering because of them.
He didn't know that Zhan Yahui had forced Shui through Guiying and Cai Lingyun to marry Jin in the past. And in revenge for that forced marriage he didn't want, he crossed every limit possible to hurt her in the worst possible way.
Though that didn't happen in this lifetime, the memories and the scars remained in Jin's heart.
Scars which Lin was unaware of.
"...Miss. Han, w-who are you talking about?" he asked with a pale expression.
Shui stared at him, chuckling again. "Look at you all so distraught and disturbed. Is this genuine or an act? I don't know and I don't care. The only thing I do know is that I don't ever want to see your face again."
He stiffened.
"I…keep trying and trying and trying but the past keeps coming between us," her eyes shone with tears and a moment later, they slipped out on her cheeks. "Every single time…we fail. I just don't know what to do or what to say to him anymore. And then you stand before me."
A fierce fury of fire laced her gaze. "Why? Why are you here? What do you want to say to me? Why should I listen to you? What the hell do you want from us now after destroying everything for us!? Is it not enough already!?"
The pain in her voice resounded harshly in the air. Her heart was stabbed over and over again and there seemed no end to that thorny path.
She wiped her eyes and sniffled, still gritting her teeth with hatred. "There is nothing you can say or do now, Hou Lin. I don't want to hear a word from you. Just stay the hell away from our lives. Whether it's me or Jin or Jun…don't ever try to cross paths with us again. You just live your life and let us live ours."
Lin watched her leave with a vacant gaze. He remained frozen, unable to process his thoughts.
Never cross paths with you…
That's what I promised Sir Jun too. That's what…I really want to do, Miss. Han.
But I just wanted to talk about that man who confessed to you.
I want to let you know that I get a bad feeling from him.
I wanted to say that he possibly has something against Sir Jin.
I don't know how much you know about him but I thought I should let you know what I saw and heard.
"It…" he whispered, "would have been easier if that man hadn't come to the cafe. Why did I have to meet him? I want to stay far away from the Liu family. But…"
He breathed in shakily, tears pooling in his eyes.
"What should I do Yahui…? You always know what to do. You always have a way out. You always take all my doubts away. So please, Yahui…Tell me what should I do?"
—
"You shouldn't be wasting your time smoking a goddamn cigarette here," Alix dryly remarked with disdain.
Jin was leaning against the art gallery building's terrace's railing with a cigarette in between his fingers.
He puffed out some smoke from his lips and said without looking at her, "Leave."
She sneered. "Sure, once I find out in what goddamn place you have hidden your guts."
"Why the hell are you talking so crankily to me?" His gaze darkened.
"Why the hell are you moping here when the woman you love is so close to being taken away?"
"It doesn't have anything to do with you so leave!"
"It has everything to do with me!"
Jin stared at her. "Excuse me? How is Shui and my relationship any of your business?"
Her lips pressed into a thin line as she impatiently tapped her heel against the terrace floor.
Okay, let's approach it a little more sensitively, she thought.
She smiled. "I am just talking in your best interests, Liu Jin. You are not cut out to be a tragic Romeo. You are just hurting Shui with your running away."
He stared at her, laughing mockingly at himself. "Hurt huh? I have already hurt her more than enough."
"...So now you are hurting her even more to compensate for hurting her before?" Her brows furrowed. "How does this work exactly?"
"What do you care!?"
"Because you are making things a big pile of mess!" She gritted her teeth.
Suddenly, Jin grabbed her arms and faced her with a deadly icy gaze and a gnashed jaw. "And what do you understand about it anyway? My mess, my guilt, my remorse, my loathe - what do you understand any of of it?"n/ô/vel/b//jn dot c//om
She stared at him in silence.
"You know nothing about me. We are not even friends so why should I be answerable to you!?"
"Because you are not the only one in this whole wide world who has made mistakes, got it!? Your mess, your guilt, your remorse, your loathe…" she bit her lip, "nobody can understand that any better than me. So don't give me that crap!"